I worry about spending money unnecessarily on things that I'd like to have. Today Rob encouraged me to buy a purse that I really admired today while scoping out a 50-80% off closeout sale at one of the local department stores that is going out of business. I haven't gotten a new purse in two years and it was a great deal so I took him up on his offer. But my first inclination was to deny myself, even though I would have thought about it for days to come. I'm proud of myself for saying "I'm important enough in this family to have something new" and not feel guilty about it afterwards. There will always be something I could have spent that money on and it's important to me that most of the time, someone come ahead of me when money has to be spent. I know that I will smile every time I use that bag for the next few months and there have been plenty of times I would pay more for a smile that I genuinely felt than each of those smiles would have averaged out if I averaged out the cost of the bag per smile it caused.

I also journaled my food intake today and walked a couple of blocks when I would have typically driven the truck on that errand. I even ran half the distance since I might as well use the little bit of exercise I was going to get today to it's best advantage. I committed to meet with someone from the kids' school to walk with tomorrow at 9. So I may have set myself up to do something I'll be proud of tomorrow. The next few days are potentially the most emotional days of the year so I'm doing all I can to keep myself in a positive placce mentally and emotionally. Meds have been taken, exercise has been done, sleep is being considered a priority, proper diet has been emphasized. Now if I could just initiate some comfortable communication between Rob and I. Things are definitely feeling a bit strained or awkward at times but we aren't truly arguing or angry/resentful/irritated with each other. We're doing all right!  ¶ 11:12 PM